This Hanukkah, Let’s Teach Our Children How to Give

This Hanukkah, Let’s Teach Our Children How to Give

By Gil Troy

Updated December 2005 version of article first published in The Canadian
Jewish News - 28 November 2002, B2-B3

Jews are preparing to celebrate Hanukkah, our festival of lights, during a
particularly dark period. The world seems to have gone mad. Islamic
extremists declare war on the West, and many, especially in Europe and
Canada, deny and dither, afraid to respond too assertively. Palestinians
declare a war of terror on Israel, and too many, including Israelis and
Jews, are quicker to blame Israel, the victim, than the Palestinian
perpetrators. The terror has slowed but not disappeared -- Israel has stood
strong, but there are too many victims throughout the world, still reeling
from the blows in Hadera and Sderot, in London and Bali, where fresh wounds
this year were added to communities already scarred by this scourge. It is
precisely during such bleak moments that we are compelled to celebrate.
Rejoicing in past victories helps put our current troubles in perspective,
reminding us that we have suffered before, and not just survived but
thrived. Moreover, with terrorists trying to rob innocents of any joy, and
any semblance of a normal life, observing holidays becomes yet another act
of defiance, a leap of faith asserting our commitment to stick to the
everyday.

Nevertheless, even as we celebrate, it behooves us to reassess the meaning
of the holidays how we observe them. Precisely now, during this time of
crisis, we should be rededicating ourselves to Jewish renewal, finding the
joy in Judaism, not just the "oy." Such a reevaluation is particularly
necessary in the case of Hanukkah, a holiday whose meaning has changed over
the years.

While Hanukkah’s basic plot line has remained unchanged for almost two
millennia, the Hanukkah we know and love is a twentieth-century invention.
The central themes we associate with Hanukkah, of heroism and power, both
physical and spiritual, were Zionist ideas; for centuries the Rabbis dwelled
on the miracle of the oil. When the Zionist revolution a century ago
reevaluated Judaism, the Maccabees’ story proved that Jewish history was not
just about the anti-Semites who hated us and the Rabbis who taught us. The
Maccabees were home-grown heroes, rooted in Israel’s ancient soil, and
willing to fight, if necessary, for their homeland, their beliefs, and their
freedom. In fact, before World War I, many Jews used Hanukkah as an
opportunity for giving not receiving, donating the modern equivalent of the
"shekel" the Biblical coin, to the Zionist cause.

At the same time, the other great twentieth-century Jewish revolution, the
rise of North American Jewry, also transformed Hanukkah. As with Passover,
the theme of "freedom" resonated in the land of liberty, giving the ancient
Jewish holiday a contemporary American flavor. But, even more important, the
quirk of scheduling, as well as the anthropological linkage to another
winter-solstice festival of lights, made for the gift-giving frenzy we see
today.

As a delightful holiday of dedication, Hanukkah has long been
child-centered. Traditionally, Jewish communities used Hanukkah to
rededicate themselves to their children’s Jewish education. In that spirit,
parents gave children "gelt" or coins to sweeten the experience of Torah
study.

In the modern world, this festival of gelt-giving and of lights became the
popular Jewish response to Christmas envy, the malady that seized many a
Jewish household each December. In fact, with eight nights, and thus eight
opportunities for gift-giving, Hanukkah became a way for Jews to trump their
Christian neighbors.

Tragically, both Hanukkah and Christmas have become "Festivals of
Consumption," in historian Daniel Boorstin’s apt phrase. A minor sweetener
to facilitate Torah study has become the major focus of the holiday, even as
this traditionally minor holiday has become a major highlight on the North
American Jewish calendar.

This, then, is the year to rededicate Hanukkah, and ourselves, to reorient
the holiday. It is time to rejuvenate the holiday by making it a highpoint
on our tzedakah calendar, our schedule of giving, while teaching our
children about generosity not just materialism. It is not realistic, nor
necessary, to declare a gift-giving ban. Most of us, thankfully, do not have
to choose between self-indulgence and good works. Moreover, to set up false
choices by being too austere, defeats the educational purpose behind the
gelt-giving. But is it too much to ask for this year, that every family,
every school, every Jewish institution, every Hanukkah get-together carve
out some time to think about others who are less fortunate, others with whom
we should share our good fortune? Is it too much to ask that as we teach our
children the joy of receiving gifts from loved ones we also teach them the
joy of giving gifts to strangers?

The smallest of gestures can teach this most important of lessons. During
the traditional Hanukkah grab bag, one additional toy can be thrown into the
hopper, and that toy can be designated for a child in need. Similarly,
children awash in presents could be asked to give one old toy and one new
toy to tzedakah. Relatives from far away who are going to send Hanukkah
checks can be encouraged to allocate part of their gift to a charity of the
children’s choice, or parents and children can agree on a certain percentage
of all gifts to be donated. Even more important, acts of loving kindness,
good deeds, should be encouraged so we go beyond many Jews’ tendency to
assume that the only way to help others is materially.

This Hanukkah, of all Hanukkahs, why not take advantage of the eight nights,
the eight candles, to designate our thoughts, our prayers, and our gifts of
time, talent, and money in the following directions:

On the First Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to the Victims of
Palestinian Terror, hoping to bring a little light into their lives:
Terrorists have slaughtered more than 1000 people, and maimed thousands. We
must adopt families of the victims, embracing them, supporting them,
befriending them, sending both love and money. For more information on how
your family, school, synagogue, friendship circle, etc., can adopt a family,
send a Hanukkah toy basket, or take any number of initiatives visit
http://www.onefamilyfund.org

To support Camp Koby, a summer camp, in memory of victims of terror for
victims of terror and their siblings, visit
http://www.kobymandell.org/home.htm

On the Second Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to the Israelis
who are still Missing in Action, honoring their heroism, and that of their
families: In 2004, the painful purgatory for the families of Adi Avitan,
Binyamin Avraham, Omer Souad, and Elchanan Tenenbaum ended, with only one
happy ending. As Tenenbaum was reunited with his family, the survivors of
Adi, Binyamin and Omer mourned, along with everyone who rejects the cruelty
of Hizballah. These four families share a unique bond of anguish with the
families of Ron Arad, Zachary Baumel, Zvi Feldman, and Yehuda Katz, who have
been missing since the 1980s. For more information, including addresses of
public officials to whom you should write, access http://www.mia.org.il

On the Third Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to the Children of
Israel, who deserve to live in freedom, free of fear: Israeli society has
proved itself remarkably resilient, but the war, combined with the economic
troubles of the last few years, took its toll. Even as the security
situation has stabilized, and the economic numbers have improved, there is
far too much poverty in Israel, and there are fears that the gap between the
rich and the poor is growing greater than ever. We must be proactive not
just reactive, thinking about how to help improve the quality of Israeli
life. One lovely initiative is the Jade Bar Shalom Books for Israel Project,
an attempt to get new and slightly used English books sent to Israeli
schoolchildren to help compensate for budget cutbacks. Since July 2005, over
41 tons of donated English literature and reference books have been
delivered to over 200 of Israel's Jewish, Druze, Bedouin, Christian, Bahai,
and Muslim public schools. For more information about this project,
including how to set up local chapters, access
http://www.edu-negev.gov.il/bs/b4i/

On the Fourth Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to the
Institutions of Israel, the well-oiled infrastructure which keeps the
society functioning: Even as we champion new initiatives, we need to
continue supporting agencies that have laid the foundation for the Jewish
state, and help make it thrive. To name only a few, during these difficult
times, Hadassah continues to maintain and modernize Israeli medical
facilities, the Magen David Adom (Israeli "Red Cross") serves all people in
Israel under very trying circumstances, the Jewish National Fund continues
renewing and rebuilding the land.

On the Fifth Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to Our Local
Jewish Community, renewing our collective ability to help us renew ourselves
and our own Jewish identities: Even while fighting fires abroad, we need to
keep our home fires burning, as it were, by supporting our local synagogues,
schools, Federations, agencies. This Hanukkah is a perfect time to
rededicate ourselves to Jewish education, on all levels, for young and old
alike. We all need to be engaged in lifelong learning, the more formal, the
better, the more time-intensive the better. More broadly, let us challenge
ourselves by asking not only how much money am I willing to donate, but how
much time am I willing to volunteer this coming year?

On the Sixth Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to neighbors in
need, bestowing gifts on neighbors who are suffering: Most of us live in
cities marked by huge disparities between haves and have-nots. Those of us
who have should take the time to help those who have less, both Jews and
non-Jews, seeing what we can do to make sure that none of our neighbors go
to bed hungry, cold, or lonely, that none of our neighbors are deprived of
the joy of celebrating this season. Wherever we stand on the War in Iraq, we
should all stand united in support of the American troops, our idealistic,
vulnerable, heroic knights in Kevlar willing to risk so much. Creative ways
of supporting the troops include donating Frequent Flyer Miles so troops on
leave can fly home for free (see http://www.heromiles.org ); buying pre-paid
calling cards so soldiers can call their loved ones for free (see
https://thor.aafes.com/scs/default.aspx ) or sending messages of support
(see https://thor.aafes.com/scs/default.aspx ) Given the coincidence between
Hanukkah and Christmas this year, we have a lovely chance to make Christmas
and Hanukkah wishes harmonize, as we celebrate Hanukkah by helping neighbors
celebrate Christmas.

On the Seventh Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to non-Jewish
friends and causes, understanding the power of affirming our common
humanity, and helping one another: It is too easy, during these times of
Jewish stress, to turn inward. These last five years we have certainly seen
the power of Hillel’s teaching, that "If I don’t care for myself, who am I?"
And the strategy worked. The situation has improved dramatically. But let us
not forget the second part which is "And if I only care for myself, what am
I?" The United Way, Centraide, and dozens of other organizations are happy
to help us help others, as are our local Federations and Jewish groups such
as Young Judaea, the Zionist youth movement which organized an impressive
aid convoy from the Northeastern United States to Katrina-stricken New
Orleans. The crisis in the Darfur region of Sudan demands our action and our
outrage. Let us not stand by idly, complaining of others' inactions, yet not
doing anything ourselves. The American Jewish World Service has been a
particular leader in this, combining education, advocacy and intelligent
giving. Check out http://www.ajws.org/index.cfm?section_id=15

On the Eight Night of Hanukkah, let us dedicate ourselves to the Power of
Teaching, of Leading Our Children by Example: If every night, we channel our
children’s charitable impulses, giving a guided tour of the possibilities of
giving, on this, the last night of Hanukkah, let us ask our children to take
the first baby steps in this world of responsibility and great satisfaction,
by asking them to pick a charitable deed, a mitzvah for someone else they
plan on doing.

The time and resources are limited; the work is great – and overwhelming.
Yet our sages teach that it is not upon us to complete all the work, nor are
we free to evade it. No one should feel guilty for failing to carve out a
charitable moment every one of the eight nights – yet no one should feel
free to ignore this challenge completely.

For decades now, kids have greeted each other every morning of Hanukkah with
the question: "What did you get last night?" This year, perhaps, we can also
teach our children to ask: "What did you give?"

Gil Troy is Professor of History at McGill University and the author of Why
I Am A Zionist: Israel, Jewish Identity and the Challenges of Today.